BBTC Breakthrough Weekend

Back from BBW!

Really thank God for meeting me and revealing things and Himself to me in such a way.. personal, direct, piercing, but yet sooo gentle, tender and loving. It's comforted me so much that He affirmed me that He loves and still loves no matter how I had become. Even when I thought I'd never deserve to encounter Him in such a tangible way, He gave that to me. And it just awed and humbled me to be loved by a God so high. Such a person like me, He cares and wants to meet me such personally.. ohh.. who am I to deserve all these?

So, now I know:

My God is sooo real not only to others but also to me

I am loved by a God so high

HE IS ALLKNOWING! I am naked!

When God wants to work and deals with me, avoid also no use :)

His agenda is better than any agenda I could think of. Because He knows what I need better than myself does.

I felt like a stranger once I came home... I don't know what's that, but it's weird. But when I told Jac bout this, she said she felt the same also. So, I'm normal, haha...

And, dunno why... Tho I feel new, but I'm feeling a bit burdened or troubled. I really dunno what's wrong and what is this all about, but I've learned to trust God. Trust Him for what He wants to reveal to me and not what I want Him to reveal to me... Trust Him to deal with me in His way and not in the way I want and wish Him to use. So, God... I'll trust You to reveal to me what this 'troubled' is all about, and help me to surrender and be open to any thing you're going to work in this stubborn clay.

I'm quite nervous and start feeling the toughness the journey ahead will be. God... don't let me fail, don't let me hold back, don't let me give up, don't let me let myself block the breaktrough.

In Jesus Name, who has overcome ALL when He said "It is done!"

Amen

This broken wings had been healed, and now it's time to re-learn to fly...

Tho this way is still not clear and certain, but I know that He is leading in a clear and certain way.. and He'll also do that in my way

This "One Life" is not going to be wasted anymore...

Julia is feeling unfit

Julia is really in an unfit condition to be an encouragement for others, for her A&C partners :(((
(Well.. just because I don't want to post it in my FB, so I post it here...)

Dunno how to describe it.. but... I myself is so 'not well'.. how to be an encouragement for others? I'm strengthless... suddenly I want to become nobody... I want to hide...

You lai le...

This feeling's overwhelming me again: "What actually am I doing???"
I think I really have a big problem with my life destination. It has been yearsss!!! And now, I really can't find any significant value in the life I'm living now. It's just like earning for living and watching my days pass one day after another... wasted days...

God... I really need to get out of this loop... I don't think this is how my life's supposed to be rite?

I want...

Apple... I got it!

So, after getting my Macbook Pro which arrived early April (actually cleared the cash somewhere in Nov 2010), last nite I went to re-contract my starhub line n decided to get the 16GB iPhone 3GS paying SGD538 - 100 (voucher from Starhub) = SGD438 :)

Took the cheapest data plan which originally priced at SGD38/mth, but got 30% off every month. Well, another story in getting this 30% off, haha..

So Starhub is having this Multi-Mobile Saver promotion which allows you to enjoy 30% off subscription fee if 3 of you sign up together (maximum 1 re-contract), so basically I need 2 more people who were signing up new lines together with me. The process of finding took a while including asking friends and colleagues around. Then Silvy suggested me to find from forums, which I tried. So, I posted up this info in some forum like hardware zone and another one (can't remember the name). After a few days, someone who saw my post sms-ed me telling me he and his cousin were signing up. But I couldn't go on the day they intended to go because I haven't got my voucher, so they went ahead without me. I was still trusting God to provide, and few days after that someone contacted me telling that he wanted to sign up. So I asked Kotin whether she has decided (she was still doing research previously) and she said yes, she was ready to sign up. There it goes... that was Wednesday nite. I had to attend Financial Freedom Seminar on Thursday nite, CG on Friday nite, Faith's hen's nite on Saturday nite, Choir on Sunday and Iris' birthday after the 2nd service, so we made appointment to meet at Tampines Mall Starhub at 5.30pm. He's James, quite a nice guy :) So, I got the iPhone ^^
Btw, on Friday, the newspapers were telling news about the new generation of iphone, iphone 4GS (HD) going to be released soon, somewhere in June/July.. wakkss.. got confuse for a while whether or not to still take the iphone 3GS now. Asked around (including Tony, Barry, Bren), and actually still haven't decided when approaching Starhub, but since that guy has been waiting for me to sign up, didn't feel good to cancel lah... So, thinking that later when the new iphone first released, it will surely be more expensive whcih I may not be able to afford, and usually new release is cmmonly not so stabil, huh??! well, at least for electronics :)

Pheww... and I was telling myself this morning: No more big expense or shopping plss.. at least in this month, except the following:
1. Dress for Faith's wedding
2. Watches for Pa & Mi
3. Flight to Skw.

I must make sure also that during BBW in Malaysia, I don't shop :)

In the bus I was praying, and I thanked God for His grace that I can afford buying macbook n iphone. But I was asking God to help me that I will guard the resources that He's given to me well and wisely that I will only spend as necessary and don't become a spendthrift person :)

I think, there should be no more purchase of gadget (tertiary need) this year.