And I, speechlessly wept during this song in Sunday service yesterday...
Make A Certain Breakthrough© Ann Chan & Ruth Ling 2006
Verse 1
In my life of searching for the plain and simple way,
Many paths were so winding, the roads were never straight,
Then the Spirit of God broke through and healed my broken wings,
And showed me the way into His heart
Chorus
And I know that God is leading in a clear and certain way,
My one life for your purpose, Jesus, I offer up this day,
To follow you completely, to do all that you say,
Cleanse my life, fill me up, And use me this day,
Make a certain breakthrough, Make it today
Verse 2
In these days of danger, Lord, we rest upon Your grace,
With Your tender and skillful hands, You shape this stubborn clay,
Yes You calm my inmost being, giving courage to hope again,
And to build this one life in power and faith
Monday, November 9, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
Lonely..
And btw, I am feeling so lonely now..
It has been really a while when I live by myself (except from God). No one to turn to.. and now when I want to change job, no one to tell to, no one to discuss with..
It has been really a while when I live by myself (except from God). No one to turn to.. and now when I want to change job, no one to tell to, no one to discuss with..
CBTL 2009
So, last nite was my first time on BBTC's stage, singing with the choir in Come Bless The Lord 2009 - Behold, the King is coming!
It was great...! Told myself to just give my best for GGod, that's the only chance, no time for pai seh or anything else... This privilege deserves only "the best"
Thank You, God.. for the privilege to serve You... even when I so undeserve..
It was great...! Told myself to just give my best for GGod, that's the only chance, no time for pai seh or anything else... This privilege deserves only "the best"
Thank You, God.. for the privilege to serve You... even when I so undeserve..
Hectic work weeks
*Started typing this on last Thursday, but didn't manage to finish and post. I'm gonna continue now :)
So I was and am still really thankful for what God's done in me while nobody else kno how stressful and troubled I was during this 2 week. But one thing I learn, though situation is still bad, you can always see God's favor and grace in midst if you choose to set your eyes on them and really acknowledge them.
2 weeks full of my heart yielding to God. Hectic weeks with not only bunch of works delayed previously by XXX's staff and then, when some incident happened, out of their panic, thrown to us to complete, but also pressure from here and there and requests from boss for statistics and records for them to defend before XXX. Stress! That's how I was during those days.
What made me frustrated and fed-up the most is the people from XXX whom I have to deal with. Cowards and double-headed snakes.
Today kinda back to normal. I can more peacefully do my work, scheduling, reporting, doing quotation as per normal. NExt week need to go to XXX to meet those 'childish' people to see their requirement to amend my records in such a way that they can keep track of the faults easily, which I thought is actually their job. What to do? we are a contractor, and they are our act-'king' client.
Despite that I still sin and compromised, when I thought I didn't deserve to receive His favor, He still poured His favor on me. And throughout the 2 weeks of hectic, I could really feel that He was with me. This is what I want to focus at. I am really very thankful that my bosses and Maz, my supervisor, are so understanding and didn't put the blame on me. It is again, ONLY BY GOD'S GRACE.My gratefulness to God made me said this, "I really have to be more radical for Him.. living only for Him"
After all the hectic, I told myself... well... whatever it is.. even if have to be mis-estimated, etc... Don't care so much.. just do my best..
But honestly, I'm kinda unmotivated now... While all those happen, I alwez thought that may be it was something to trigger me to feel the urgency to hunt for a new job, haha..
Note: XXX = name of our client that I'm gonna hide here ^^
So I was and am still really thankful for what God's done in me while nobody else kno how stressful and troubled I was during this 2 week. But one thing I learn, though situation is still bad, you can always see God's favor and grace in midst if you choose to set your eyes on them and really acknowledge them.
2 weeks full of my heart yielding to God. Hectic weeks with not only bunch of works delayed previously by XXX's staff and then, when some incident happened, out of their panic, thrown to us to complete, but also pressure from here and there and requests from boss for statistics and records for them to defend before XXX. Stress! That's how I was during those days.
What made me frustrated and fed-up the most is the people from XXX whom I have to deal with. Cowards and double-headed snakes.
Today kinda back to normal. I can more peacefully do my work, scheduling, reporting, doing quotation as per normal. NExt week need to go to XXX to meet those 'childish' people to see their requirement to amend my records in such a way that they can keep track of the faults easily, which I thought is actually their job. What to do? we are a contractor, and they are our act-'king' client.
Despite that I still sin and compromised, when I thought I didn't deserve to receive His favor, He still poured His favor on me. And throughout the 2 weeks of hectic, I could really feel that He was with me. This is what I want to focus at. I am really very thankful that my bosses and Maz, my supervisor, are so understanding and didn't put the blame on me. It is again, ONLY BY GOD'S GRACE.My gratefulness to God made me said this, "I really have to be more radical for Him.. living only for Him"
After all the hectic, I told myself... well... whatever it is.. even if have to be mis-estimated, etc... Don't care so much.. just do my best..
But honestly, I'm kinda unmotivated now... While all those happen, I alwez thought that may be it was something to trigger me to feel the urgency to hunt for a new job, haha..
Note: XXX = name of our client that I'm gonna hide here ^^
My heart
I sometimes like to type my post in a notepad first then copy and paste it to the blog. And just now when I was clearing my 'private' folder in office computer suddenly I found this post that I forgot to post, haha.. I think it was typed on 2 Oct 09.
Dunno why but today I'm really soo overwhelmed by all that's going on in the world recently... the disaster after disaster... Taiwan, Phillipines, Vietnam, Cambodia and especially now, Padang, Indonesia.It's even very hard for me to concentrate on my work today, and feeling soo down.
This time, not only my heart hurts seeing those who suffer, especially the children who lost everything everyone, stood on the road, surrounded by the ruins, under the rain not knowing what to do where to go, but also my heart is troubled. Troubled of the fact that it is so near already.
During the last sessions of DTC class, we had been talking about sharing the gospel, and we are 'required' to intentionally share gospel with at least 2 people before graduating from the course. High Quest is also about sharing the Gospel. And, CBTL is about the second coming of the Lord as King. These all are really wrapped up by the disasters that happen in one month. I guess this is the first time I felt such a strong feeling of urgency to chuan fu ying and feeling very helpless. I even thought if I should stop all my self-achievement aiming, stop working, to fully serve the Lord, helping people, bringing people to Christ.Acchh... if only I have enough courage to decide so..
But anyway, God.. pls do not let this compassion dim and help me know and obey whatever we can do for now.
Dunno why but today I'm really soo overwhelmed by all that's going on in the world recently... the disaster after disaster... Taiwan, Phillipines, Vietnam, Cambodia and especially now, Padang, Indonesia.It's even very hard for me to concentrate on my work today, and feeling soo down.
This time, not only my heart hurts seeing those who suffer, especially the children who lost everything everyone, stood on the road, surrounded by the ruins, under the rain not knowing what to do where to go, but also my heart is troubled. Troubled of the fact that it is so near already.
During the last sessions of DTC class, we had been talking about sharing the gospel, and we are 'required' to intentionally share gospel with at least 2 people before graduating from the course. High Quest is also about sharing the Gospel. And, CBTL is about the second coming of the Lord as King. These all are really wrapped up by the disasters that happen in one month. I guess this is the first time I felt such a strong feeling of urgency to chuan fu ying and feeling very helpless. I even thought if I should stop all my self-achievement aiming, stop working, to fully serve the Lord, helping people, bringing people to Christ.Acchh... if only I have enough courage to decide so..
But anyway, God.. pls do not let this compassion dim and help me know and obey whatever we can do for now.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
心靈不打烊 - 故鄉合唱團
Listening to GoodTV's Xin Lin Bu Da Yang. He Rong was interviewing a Taiwan Christian composer and conductor. He said, after being a Christian, there were a lot of self-controlled to be done. Then may be sometimes we will think, then it'll be best if during our youth we can do all the things first (thing that we will not be allowed to do after being Christian), then enough of all those, at age of 20s become Christian and have all those sins forgiven. But for him, he's grateful that he has become a Christian since very young, in his 13. Why? because by that, he can understand problem faced by Christians more. When He Rong asked what's for him the biggest problem a Christian face? He answered, it's when you are spiritually down, troubled, especially if you are a leader, it's very hard for you to tell or let others know. And yep, it's true!, i said in my heart. So by understanding this, he can be a company for those facing this situation. When they are speechless, down in their loneliness, he can be there to understand, care and comfort.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
SMS Berisi Isu Diskriminasi dari Kampung Pecinan
Jawa Pos[ Senin, 05 Oktober 2009 ]
SMS Berisi Isu Diskriminasi dari Kampung Pecinan
HARI keempat pascagempa di Padang mulai diwarnai munculnya isu-isu sensitif dan kabar penjarahan yang potensial mempergetir nasib para korban.
Warga Tionghoa yang bermukim di sebuah kampung pecinan di pusat Kota Padang, misalnya, dikabarkan telah menjadi korban diskriminasi dalam hal penanganan evakuasi dan pembagian bantuan. Sebuah pesan singkat yang beredar dari HP ke HP kemarin, misalnya, berbunyi: Tell the world, Stop the donation to West Sumatra!!! Primordialism and racism is happening in there, Chinese people didn't allowed to have food and was forced to buy the food aid. Family of mine was at there!!! Please sent out this massage to the world so they know the true!!! (katakan pada dunia, stop bantuan ke Sumatra Barat!!! Primordialisme dan rasisme terjadi di sana, warga Tionghoa tak diperbolehkan mendapatkan makanan dan dipaksa membeli bantuan makanan. Keluargaku di sana!!! Tolong sebarkan pesan ini ke seluruh dunia biar mereka tahu kenyataan ini!!!)
Benar tidaknya kenyataan yang terjadi di kampung Tionghoa dengan isi SMS itu, Sutan Zaili Asril, direktur Padang Ekspres, anak perusahaan Jawa Pos di Padang semalam memberi penuturan. Dari pengamatannya selama empat hari setelah terjadi gempa, proses evakuasi terhadap korban bencana di Pondok China memang dinilai lambat. Hal itulah yang memicu merebaknya isu pendistribusian bantuan yang tak adil di beberapa tempat, termasuk di kawasan Pecinan.
Padahal, buruknya manajemen dan ketidakberdayaan petugaslah yang sebenarnya terjadi. Di sisi lain, para korban sangat membutuhkan bantuan. Zaili menilai, distribusi bantuan yang diberikan pemkot juga tidak mengarah. "Entah kenapa, kesannya pemerintah cenderung memprioritaskan evakuasi di Hotel Ambacang, LBB Gama, Prayoga, Sigma, maupun LBB Lia. Padahal, evakuasi di Pondok China maupun Pasaraya seharusnya juga menjadi prioritas karena jumlah korbannya sangat banyak," terang Zaili lebih lanjut.
Perlu juga diketahui, situasi lebih memiriskan dulu juga terjadi beberapa hari pascagempa tsunami Aceh pada 2004. Buruknya manajemen penyaluran bantuan dan minimnya pengawasan membuat situasi menjadi bar-bar dan tak terkontrol. Di berbagai tempat di Aceh, waktu itu, para penjarah bahkan sampai tega memotong jari mayat korban tsunami untuk mengambil cincin, anting di kuping, dan perhiasan lain.
"Sejak hari pertama gempa, kami belum mendapat bantuan sama sekali," kata Ny Esther, salah seorang warga yang bermukim di Jalan Klenteng. Padahal, lokasi kampung tempat tinggal Esther berada di pusat Kota Padang. Apalagi, rumah wanita 43 tahun itu luluh lantak. Bangunannya tinggal separo, seperti dibelah menjadi dua.
Menanggapi isu sensitif itu, Pengurus Wilayah Muhammadiyah Jatim Sulton Amin benar-benar sangat prihatin. Menurut dia, hal itu sangat memalukan. Terlebih, perhatian dunia saat ini juga mengarah pada kondisi para korban gempa. ''Jangan sampai relawan asing yang membantu di Padang hengkang sebelum waktunya gara-gara masalah ini,'' ujarnya.
Dia menambahkan, sudah waktunya membuang ego pribadi yang muncul akibat perbedaan suku, agama, ras ,dan warna kulit. Perasaan senasib sebagai warga Indonesia dan sesama korban gempa yang membutuhkan bantuan seharusnya mampu melebur perbedaan itu.
Selain itu, dia mengharapkan seluruh masyarakat tetap tenang dan tidak terprovokasi. Bahkan, dia siap membantu kalau langkah prosedural seperti melaporkan kepada pihak terkait tetap tidak membawa perubahan. ''Langkah terkahir adalah menyerahkan bantuan langsung ke etnis Tionghoa maupun kelompok lain yang didiskriminasikan,'' tegasnya.
SMS Berisi Isu Diskriminasi dari Kampung Pecinan
HARI keempat pascagempa di Padang mulai diwarnai munculnya isu-isu sensitif dan kabar penjarahan yang potensial mempergetir nasib para korban.
Warga Tionghoa yang bermukim di sebuah kampung pecinan di pusat Kota Padang, misalnya, dikabarkan telah menjadi korban diskriminasi dalam hal penanganan evakuasi dan pembagian bantuan. Sebuah pesan singkat yang beredar dari HP ke HP kemarin, misalnya, berbunyi: Tell the world, Stop the donation to West Sumatra!!! Primordialism and racism is happening in there, Chinese people didn't allowed to have food and was forced to buy the food aid. Family of mine was at there!!! Please sent out this massage to the world so they know the true!!! (katakan pada dunia, stop bantuan ke Sumatra Barat!!! Primordialisme dan rasisme terjadi di sana, warga Tionghoa tak diperbolehkan mendapatkan makanan dan dipaksa membeli bantuan makanan. Keluargaku di sana!!! Tolong sebarkan pesan ini ke seluruh dunia biar mereka tahu kenyataan ini!!!)
Benar tidaknya kenyataan yang terjadi di kampung Tionghoa dengan isi SMS itu, Sutan Zaili Asril, direktur Padang Ekspres, anak perusahaan Jawa Pos di Padang semalam memberi penuturan. Dari pengamatannya selama empat hari setelah terjadi gempa, proses evakuasi terhadap korban bencana di Pondok China memang dinilai lambat. Hal itulah yang memicu merebaknya isu pendistribusian bantuan yang tak adil di beberapa tempat, termasuk di kawasan Pecinan.
Padahal, buruknya manajemen dan ketidakberdayaan petugaslah yang sebenarnya terjadi. Di sisi lain, para korban sangat membutuhkan bantuan. Zaili menilai, distribusi bantuan yang diberikan pemkot juga tidak mengarah. "Entah kenapa, kesannya pemerintah cenderung memprioritaskan evakuasi di Hotel Ambacang, LBB Gama, Prayoga, Sigma, maupun LBB Lia. Padahal, evakuasi di Pondok China maupun Pasaraya seharusnya juga menjadi prioritas karena jumlah korbannya sangat banyak," terang Zaili lebih lanjut.
Perlu juga diketahui, situasi lebih memiriskan dulu juga terjadi beberapa hari pascagempa tsunami Aceh pada 2004. Buruknya manajemen penyaluran bantuan dan minimnya pengawasan membuat situasi menjadi bar-bar dan tak terkontrol. Di berbagai tempat di Aceh, waktu itu, para penjarah bahkan sampai tega memotong jari mayat korban tsunami untuk mengambil cincin, anting di kuping, dan perhiasan lain.
"Sejak hari pertama gempa, kami belum mendapat bantuan sama sekali," kata Ny Esther, salah seorang warga yang bermukim di Jalan Klenteng. Padahal, lokasi kampung tempat tinggal Esther berada di pusat Kota Padang. Apalagi, rumah wanita 43 tahun itu luluh lantak. Bangunannya tinggal separo, seperti dibelah menjadi dua.
Menanggapi isu sensitif itu, Pengurus Wilayah Muhammadiyah Jatim Sulton Amin benar-benar sangat prihatin. Menurut dia, hal itu sangat memalukan. Terlebih, perhatian dunia saat ini juga mengarah pada kondisi para korban gempa. ''Jangan sampai relawan asing yang membantu di Padang hengkang sebelum waktunya gara-gara masalah ini,'' ujarnya.
Dia menambahkan, sudah waktunya membuang ego pribadi yang muncul akibat perbedaan suku, agama, ras ,dan warna kulit. Perasaan senasib sebagai warga Indonesia dan sesama korban gempa yang membutuhkan bantuan seharusnya mampu melebur perbedaan itu.
Selain itu, dia mengharapkan seluruh masyarakat tetap tenang dan tidak terprovokasi. Bahkan, dia siap membantu kalau langkah prosedural seperti melaporkan kepada pihak terkait tetap tidak membawa perubahan. ''Langkah terkahir adalah menyerahkan bantuan langsung ke etnis Tionghoa maupun kelompok lain yang didiskriminasikan,'' tegasnya.
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